“To be fair, your honor, Mercury was indeed in retrograde.”

On January 7th, ski trails at Alturas Lake and Park Creek have been groomed and should provide very good skiing opportunities. However, classic tracks may be missing from some trails due to multiple mechanical breakdowns. We reckon that our string of breakdowns is due to the overwhelming effect of retrograde motion by Mercury and Mars. Work on snowmobiles at both areas is scheduled for Saturday and our valiant Groomers have been provided with spray bottles of Mercury retrograde balancer.